Hands out, head down, eyes closed, hope they just go away

there i was at five-years-old
telling me to push you
off the platform
didn't think i should
when you reassured me
watching you fall
something shifted inside of me
i ran but it was too late
i was already seen

there i was at ten-years-old
still trying to hide
from falling to fear
my smile was real
for which they despise
and wish to take away
something's breaking inside
their fingers pointed
i just want to feel safe